Pirates of the Instant Messanger
by Ms.Spades
Summary: It's back once more with a little more, but more to come.
1. Chapter 1

Pirates of the Instant Messaging

Rumguzzler- Captain Jack Sparrow

Govsdaughter- Elizabeth Swann

Ihatepirates- Will Turner

Itsmyship- Captain Barbossa

Vilecreatures- Commodore Norrington

Flyingdutchman- Davy Jones

Eastindiatradingcomp- Lord Beckett

Bootstrap- Bill Turner

Yougounclejack – Little Jack (Barbossa's – Cotton

Thisonedoessplintersomethingterrible – Raggetti

Stoprubbinit – Pintel

Youstolemyboat - Annamaria

Ayeseaturtles – Gibbs

Her or Mysticnotwitch or Youwanttoknowme – Tia Dalma

Sparrow1-? – All of Jack's siblings

Seasponge – Captain Grant Sparrow

Rumguzzler: Hello, luv. Where'd the rum go?

Govsdaughter: It's probably sinking to the bottom of the ocean right about now.

Rumguzzler: What?! That's it! Off my ship! Now!

Govsdaughter: It wasn't me! It was Will!

Ihatepirates: Elizabeth! You weren't supposed to tell him!

Rumguzzler: William? Why?

Govsdaughter: Well, he thought it would motivate you to move faster.

Ihatepirates: I did not! She's lying! Jack, come on you know me!

Rumguzzler: You right I do know you. Elizabeth if you will excuse me. I have some business to attend to.

Govsdaughter: Jack, what are you doing? Jack?!

Rumguzzler: Wot?!

Govsdaughter: What are you doing? Or should I say what are you planning on doing?

Rumguzzler: I'm going to free my ship of excess baggage.

Govsdaughter: Run Will! Run!

Ihatepirates: I hate bloody pirates!

Ihatepirates sign off

Rumguzzler: Curse you Elizabeth!

Rumguzzler signs off

Govsdaughter: Is any one left?

Vilecreatures: I'm here.

Govsdaughter: Oh, no! Not you! Some else sign on, quickly!!! I beg you!!!

Eastindiatradingcomp: Isn't she just so loving?

Govsdaughter: Oh, no! Not you too!

Eastindiatradingcomp: Of course I am. Why shouldn't I be? Elizabeth? Elizabeth?!

Govsdaughter signs off, Flyingdutchman signs on

Flyingdutchman: I see ya two are still annoyin' Miss Swann. More of ran h'r off is more like et.

Vilecreatures: Hello, Jones. How many pirates have you taken lately?

Flyingdutchman: Not as many as I'd like.

Eastindiatradingcomp: You know I still have your heart right?

Flyingdutchman: So you're the one who has my heart not Sparra! I'm going to kill you! Who are you again?

Eastindiatradingcomp: Easy I'm Eastindiatradingcomp. Come on it's not that hard.

Flyingdutchman: Are yu callin' me daft?! I control the sea and your fate!

Eastindiatradingcomp: I am not a pirate!

Flyingdutchman: So you must be Lord Cutler Beckett, then aye?

Vilecreatures: How did he figure it out?

Eastindiatradingcomp: Quiet, Norrington!!

Bootstrap:z

Flyingdutchman: Mr. Turner are you listening in on our conversation?

Bootstrap: Bloody key board. I wasn't listening in I was waiting for Will to sign back on.

Flyingdutchman: Sign off Turner before the next time you hear from your son is face to face.

Bootstrap signs off, Ihatepirates signs on

Ihatepirates: Elizabeth? Are you still on?

Vilecreatures: No she signed off when I signed on.

Ihatepirates: Norrington, I didn't know you had an IM. When did you get it?

Rumguzzler signs on

Rumguzzler: I bet Beckett had to tell him to create it, after Jones showed him.

Eastindiatradingcomp: Are you calling me stupid?

Flyingdutchman: Jack, how in the world are you on here? What do you think I am his servant?!

Govsdaughter signs on

Rumguzzler: Jones is that you? Oh. Well, I… look the Governor's daughter!

Govsdaughter: Curse you Jack! How did you know I signed on?

Rumguzzler: Because every time some one signs on or off it says so! Honestly do you people think I can't read?

Rumguzzler: Do you?!

Flyingdutchman: Honestly, I'm shocked to hear you say that.

Eastindiatradingcomp: How do you know how to read?

Rumguzzler: How do you know how to talk?

Vilecreatures: How dare you insult Lord Beckett! Who do you think you are?!

Rumguzzler: Firstly I don't think I'm any one I know I'm Captain, Captain!, Jack Sparrow. Secondly I dare I dare. Thirdly Beckett is Norrington now talking for you?

Eastindiatradingcomp: I can speak for myself!!

Govsdaughter: You can? Can he? Can James speak for himself too?

Vilecreatures: I can too!

Eastindiatradingcomp: So can I!

Rumguzzler: You can? Shocking!

Itsmyship signs on

Itsmyship: What are you all fighting about?

Rumguzzler: Barbossa?! What in the world are you doing?! How are you on here?!

Itsmyship: Same as you, Jack. How are any of us on here?

Rumguzzler: Good question.

Yougounclejack: jfibnfdifkjjfnndodjd.

Rumguzzler: Who is that?

Itsmyship: Who made Jack an IM?

Rumguzzler: Hey!

Itsmyship: Not you!

Rumguzzler: Oh, right you named the monkey Jack.

Youstolemyboat signs on

Youstolemyboat: Jack is that you?

Rumguzzler: No it's not. There is no Jack on here.

Vilecreatures: Does he really expect to fool her?

Eastindiatradingcomp: I think he does.

Govsdaughter: Give up Jack. There's no fooling her.

Ihatepirates: Yeah, and it isn't like she's right in front of you.

Flyingdutchman: Who is that?

Itsmyship: Annamaria. Only woman Jack ever feared and apparently still does.

Rumguzzler: I am not afraid of her!

Youstolemyboat: Jack!

Rumguzzler: whimpers Ok maybe a little.

Itsmyship: Jack.

Rumguzzler: Ok, fine, a lot. There happy now?!

Youstolemyboat: You still haven't given me my boat!!!

Rumguzzler: I promised you a boat and you will get a boat.

Youstolemyboat: You will. Hold on I have to go.

Youstolemyboat signs off

Rumguzzler: Thank you!

Itsmyship: I think I'll go too.

Govsdaughter: Me too.

Ihatepirates: Count me in.

Eastindiatradingcomp: Count us in.

Flyingdutchman: Some one has a debt to pay.

all sign off

Rumguzzler: Is any one still here?

Rumguzzler: Hello?

Yougounclejack: kjdfi hdfjuhjf fujhfsdkkiv.

Rumguzzler: Oh, great the monkey.

Yougounclejack: kjdf fjhfmfbn khhmjfidfigidjf!!!

Rumguzzler: Ok, ok! Sorry! At least it's some one to talk too.

Yougounclejack: jhfi ojdfndfj ithbtrjbiudshvnjfguh.

Rumguzzler: What?! You're leaving too?!

Yougounclejack: I hjkfdjdfiuohfnjdf u hjg jdgfiuo j d g.

Rumguzzler: No! Wait! I take it back! Please don't leave me!!!!

Yougounclejack signs off, Sparrow15 signs on

Rumguzzler: I'm all alone. Does no one care for Captain Jack Sparrow?! All alone in the world except for my father and annoying siblings who just love to pop up when ever they feel like it.

Sparrow15: Hey Jack!

Rumguzzler: Speaking of the devils. Is that you Anne?

Sparrow15: I told you my name is Mary Bonny not Anne!

Rumguzzler: on that note.

Rumguzzler signs off

Sparrow15: Fine be that way.

Sparrow15 signs off

The Next Day:

Govsdaughter: Will, are you there?

Ihatepirates: Yes, Elizabeth. What happened to Jack?

Govsdaughter: Well Little Jack was still there but Jack insulted it and it signed off then his sister signed on and he signed off. Other than that I don't know.

Ihatepirates: Are you serious?! He insulted Little Jack? How?

Govsdaughter: he called it a monkey.

Ihatepirates: But it is a monkey.

Yougounclejack: kf hjfjoisddfkhfi hjdjfjh!!!

Govsdaughter: Will! He doesn't like people to call him a monkey. He does have a name you know.

Ihatepirates: Alright. Sorry Little Jack.

Yougounclejack: ksjdf jfkjfhsd jdfh.

Ihatepirates: What did he say?

Govsdaughter: I don't know. I don't speak monkey.

Rumguzzler: Well, you look like one, luv. And Will he said he will forgive you this time but frankly he hates you.

Ihatepirates: All that in three little words?

Rumguzzler: Yes.

Govsdaughter: What do you mean I look like a monkey?! Wait a minute you speak monkey?

Rumguzzler: After spending so much time with it when I was captain that is the only person you can talk to that won't tell any one, besides the rum.

Govsdaughter: What about calling me a monkey?

Govsdaughter: Jack I know you're still there.

Rumguzzler: How do you know, luv?

Govsdaughter: You just answered me, that's how.

Rumguzzler: $#(&&

Ihatepirates: Jack! That's no way to talk in front of a lady!

Rumguzzler: You're right.

Ihatepirates: Thank you.

Rumguzzler: I'm sorry Will.

Ihatepirates: Jack!

Govsdaughter: Jack!


	2. Chapter 2

Rumguzzler: Wot? It's true. Oh fine, I'm sorry Will.

Ihatepirates: You're forgiven Jack, but I might not next time.

Rumguzzler: You are too kind. By the way you will forgive me next time, because you always do.

Govsdaughter: He does have a point Will. You are too honest not to forgive him.

Ihatepirates: I know and I hate it. No one takes me seriously because of it.

Govsdaughter: I take you seriously and I love you the way you are honesty and all.

Rumguzzler: Well personally I find it to be a nuisance. Though I must say I am flattered how like me you have become but it needs to stop. It's starting to get creepy.

Ihatepirates: I'm not becoming like you, am I Elizabeth?

Ihatepirates: Elizabeth?

Govsdaughter: Well, Will you haven't exactly been acting yourself lately. I'm honestly getting worried. It's like I don't know you any more.

Ihatepirates: Elizabeth?! How can you say that?! I tell you every thing! Even though you don't always tell me I still tell you!

Govsdaughter: No you don't! You never told me about your plan to free your father! Does that not count?

Ihatepirates: You know what I mean! I never meant to hurt you!

Rumguzzler: Well not that this isn't exciting or any thing, mate, but I do believe my intuition on these sorts of things you've already lost, mate. You should've learned from my example that the lady is always right, right, luv?

Govsdaughter: Yes, Jack, you're right for once.

Rumguzzler: For once? What do you mean 'for once'?! I'm always right…normally….usually…..sometimes…..most of the time…..ok not that much!! You happy?! I admitted it!!

Govsdaughter: Good boy, Jack, I'm proud of you. You finally admitted your faults or at least one of them.

Rumguzzler: What?! Faults?! Not me! I don't have faults! Maybe that poser Barbossa has faults but not me!! I'm Captain Jack Sparrow!! The best known pirate in the Caribbean!! I do not have faults!!

Ihatepirates: Come on, Jack, you have to admit you do have faults. You are human after all and all humans have faults.

Rumguzzler: Do not. I don't have to admit any thing especially to you two.

Govsdaughter: What did I do?!



Rumguzzler: You killed me! That was plenty there to kill any if any trust I had for you!

Govsdaughter: Jack! I had to! To save the rest of us! You know that!

Ihatepirates: He does have a point though, Elizabeth. You were the one who killed him and sent him to the locker.

Govsdaughter: Whose side are you on?! Will?!

Ihatepirates: I'm on no ones side! I'm just saying from an outsider's point of view he has a point.

Rumguzzler: An excellent point, if I may say so myself.

Ihatepirates: I don't know about that, Jack.

Rumguzzler: Whose side are you on?!

Govsdaughter: Will, pick one of us and not both. So who will it be? Jack? Or me?

Ihatepirates: …..

Govsdaughter: Will?

Ihatepirates: I'm thinking.

Govsdaughter: Will!

Ihatepirates: What? I have to think about it. So what?!

Rumguzzler: We both know who he is going to pick so you don't really have to think.

Govsdaughter: You're right, Jack. He's going to pick me.

Rumguzzler: Me.

Ihatepirates: Jack.

Govsdaughter: Jack?

Rumguzzler: Me?

Ihatepirates: ME?!

Govsdaughter: HIM?!

Ihatepirates: What? I said I pick Jack's side. Well, I mean he makes more sense on this one and he does have a point on this.

Govsdaughter: But I'm your wife?! You're supposed to take my side!


End file.
